The Want Without the Will..

That is what I have. I have the extreme want without the will to do it.

I HATE HATE HATE how I look. But you know, I'm not super duper fat either. I guess I'm a little bigger than the average American. NOT THE TWIG AMERICANS the genuine average American. As much as I wish I was skinnier, I don't have the will to do it. I've tried going to the gym but I get embarrassed because of how I look. I try the eating less thing (which I can do) but I love trying new foods and stuff like that. I don't know how to discipline myself into doing something like that. I tried doing like at home salads but they never taste right. I procrastinate a lot. Especially over this subject. I'm hoping going to college will help with that but the problem is I don't know if it will. I really want to lose the weight but I need help to do it....I need the will and the fire to get my cus up and go to the gym or walk around the block or do something....I'm trying to walk more if that counts for anything. I just...I don't know. I look for a quick fix when in reality I just need to get up and move. I know why I don't lose weight I just don't do anything to change that. I am NOT obese so don't get that idea. I just know I need to lose some pounds.

Jen.L.<3